I am amazed that people just assume you are incapable of doing something because you’re female.
I got asked if my computer was turned on when I said I have an issue sending out mails. The IT people just assumed I have no computer knowledge because I am a girl. I am not saying that I am the best at computer stuff, but I know better than to try sending mails from a computer that has been turned off. Even my grandmother knows better than that.
A friend of mine made the mistake of shedding a few tears at work once. She was having a bad day, her project wasn’t going as well as planned and then she got yelled at for something that was only partially her fault. But after that, every time there was anything that involved her, co-workers tip-toed around her speaking to her in calculated soft voices and instructing each other, “Don’t say anything harsh. You might make her cry.” Needless to say, she reached a tipping point soon enough and retaliated by shouting at one of her co-workers for picking on her when he asked her if she was going to cry after a stressful meeting. Then they instructed each other not to bother her lest she screams.
Women who are considered pretty or good looking have the crap end of the stick at a workplace. Someone I know once told me that because she dresses up for work and generally is what is considered “beautiful” people tend to make an assumption that she is all looks and no brains. She said that she wonders very often whether it would help her case if she wore dowdy clothes to work. It’s not the case always but a good looking woman has to work twice as hard as compared to a good looking man to be taken seriously on an intellectual front. The same person told me, “Try making a valid point in a meeting when you’re the only woman there, a good looking one at that.” It was the first time I met someone who was lamenting the fact that they looked good.
Not very long ago, I was asked to take a guy along to drop me home because we were leaving work late. I know that I was just being looked out for and perhaps it was more because of the unsafe nature of the city combined with me being a young woman. That’s when it struck me that it really doesn’t matter how progressive your city is, if the women can’t travel alone in the nights, we still have a long way to go.
It also didn’t stop me from feeling bad that as a woman that is still the thing I can’t do; travel alone across the city post midnight. I could try of course, but should there be an unpleasant situation, then I will be the woman who asked for trouble.
I got asked if my computer was turned on when I said I have an issue sending out mails. The IT people just assumed I have no computer knowledge because I am a girl. I am not saying that I am the best at computer stuff, but I know better than to try sending mails from a computer that has been turned off. Even my grandmother knows better than that.
A friend of mine made the mistake of shedding a few tears at work once. She was having a bad day, her project wasn’t going as well as planned and then she got yelled at for something that was only partially her fault. But after that, every time there was anything that involved her, co-workers tip-toed around her speaking to her in calculated soft voices and instructing each other, “Don’t say anything harsh. You might make her cry.” Needless to say, she reached a tipping point soon enough and retaliated by shouting at one of her co-workers for picking on her when he asked her if she was going to cry after a stressful meeting. Then they instructed each other not to bother her lest she screams.
Women who are considered pretty or good looking have the crap end of the stick at a workplace. Someone I know once told me that because she dresses up for work and generally is what is considered “beautiful” people tend to make an assumption that she is all looks and no brains. She said that she wonders very often whether it would help her case if she wore dowdy clothes to work. It’s not the case always but a good looking woman has to work twice as hard as compared to a good looking man to be taken seriously on an intellectual front. The same person told me, “Try making a valid point in a meeting when you’re the only woman there, a good looking one at that.” It was the first time I met someone who was lamenting the fact that they looked good.
Not very long ago, I was asked to take a guy along to drop me home because we were leaving work late. I know that I was just being looked out for and perhaps it was more because of the unsafe nature of the city combined with me being a young woman. That’s when it struck me that it really doesn’t matter how progressive your city is, if the women can’t travel alone in the nights, we still have a long way to go.
It also didn’t stop me from feeling bad that as a woman that is still the thing I can’t do; travel alone across the city post midnight. I could try of course, but should there be an unpleasant situation, then I will be the woman who asked for trouble.
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